Looking up.

I did well today. I feel more stable.

And to that comment about me needing therapy-- yes, I am in therapy, but this is my blog and I feel free to write about anything I want to, as I should. I had a moment of crisis and in order to work through it, I wrote it down. And you know what? I felt a whole lot better after doing so. My last post was the first time I had ever actually WRITTEN DOWN any of those things that I felt. I did not ask anyone reading it to be my therapist or to believe I am normal or sane or more importantly, to think my emotions are founded or unfounded. I struggle between issues with my father and my weight everyday and "get a grip" doesn't really do much to alleviate that. So thank you for your concern, is what I meant to say.

Ok, enough negative energy.

I went spinning last night for the first time in three months and it was HARDCORE. The instructor was a maniac, no warm-up, no cool-down and NO breaks. But I kinda liked it. Actually, I really liked it. For any of you who have seen the latest season of the Biggest Loser, I always said I wanted a personal trainer like Jillian--someone who would yell and scream and kick my ass. And that's exactly what this guy did. Now, I know that sort of "encouragement" isn't for everyone, but I swear I work ten times harder and longer when they yell and scream. And it wasn't all screaming, he's a singer too--yelling out lines to songs in the middle of a hard climb. It was entertaining and motivating at the same time.

Also, I have been meaning to discuss the importance of the ever perfect food: the banana. I honestly think monkeys may have it right. There are days when I eat bananas like they are going out of style. I'll eat one as soon as I wake up, after a run, after dinner as dessert, or just as an easy snack while running errands so I'm not tempted to do a Starbucks run (mmmm... blueberry coffee cake). Bananas are portable, filled with potassium (no charlie horses for me!) and quite possibly the most delicious fruit out there--granted, this is only my opinion, but come on, bananas are pretty damn tasty, right? Right?

I have a friend who varies between being a vegan and a raw-foodist. For those of you who don't know what "raw-food" diet is, well it's pretty self-explanatory--you just don't eat anything that has been cooked. She will eat a lot of fruit, natural fats like avocado and so many vegetables she had to start growing her own. :) Now, while I think that some of her dietary habits are a little extreme, I DO think that fruits and vegetables play a LARGE role in a healthy diet. I, personally, would be happy eating fruit all day long, every day. My head, however, craves refined sugar and my muscles crave protein from all the running. So I give them what they need, more protein than refined sugar obviously (I won't say I've had a perfect day unless I've had NO refined sugar that day--this includes bread), but fruit is really my first love.

And THEN, I found people on the internet who agree. What a surprise, right? They are called "fruitarians"- Crazy Banana People

They are indeed a little batty, but they might have some good points.

That is all, I hope everyone has a lovely evening...